The Philadelphia Eagles shocked the football world Wednesda..."/> The Philadelphia Eagles shocked the football world Wednesda..."/>

Defensive Coordinator: An Updated Short List

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The Philadelphia Eagles shocked the football world Wednesday when they named their offensive line coach, Juan Castillo, their new defensive coordinator. This outside the box approach could inspire creativity when it comes to filing the defensive coordinator opening in Arizona. I have been on the phone all morning with unnamed sources with knowledge of the fact that the Arizona Cardinals are searching for a defensive coordinator, and they have leaked me the following list of the current top candidates:

1)      Matt Leinart – The tenth overall pick by the Cardinals in the 2006 NFL draft, the former Heisman winner has proven his understanding of forcing turnovers in the NFL, with nearly 4% of all passing plays when he was on the field resulting in interceptions.

2)      John McCain – After losing the 2008 election Senator McCain has desperately desired something to control. Focusing his 2008 campaign on national defense, he seems like a perfect fit for the franchise looking to turn around their defensive struggles of 2010.

3)      Barbara Eden – Perhaps no other candidate possesses the potential to grant Ken Whisenhunt’s wish for a respectable defense quite like this Arizona native.

4)      Dierks Bentley – While Bentley’s football knowledge is not known, his popularity could lead to increased ticket sales, as well as saving money on talent to perform prior to the 2011 home opener. This might not seem like a resume worthy of considering, however let us not forget FOOTBALL IS A BUSINESS.

5)      Joe Jonas – Another musician who could fit the needs of the franchise, could help to grow the team’s popularity in the 8-16 female demographic. Hook them when they are young, and they’ll buy season tickets for life.

6)      Bill Davis – Among the most experienced of this list of candidates.

While this list boasts some prime candidates, there is always the opportunity for a dark horse to steal the job at the zero hour. I wouldn’t be surprised if the new defensive coordinator isn’t even on the short list.